06 Oct Distractions, Obstacles and Shiny Objects … aka Pain

I was on a roll. Inspired. Motivated. Engaged. Creativity bursting at the seams… and then it happened. Every distraction you can imagine came rolling toward me. It reminds me of a cartoon by Gary Larson. A heavy-set woman is being sucked into the candy store and she’s holding on to a parking meter for dear life.

Do you ever have moments like that? Where all of a sudden the dirt on the floor is more compelling than the proposal that’s due? Maybe, like me, you notice a one-day sale at your favorite store and you’re already in reverse before you can discern your decision. Or you realize you “deserve” time, a massage, a break, chocolate, a round of golf, a walk in the woods…

Those callings, those moments, are your worst enemy. I know, you thought your enemy was your office-mate or your in-law. Nope. Your enemy is the fear that your gift won’t measure up, that you can’t do it, or it doesn’t matter if you do. Call it resistance – call it Terence for all I care – but do be called on it. Do notice and become conscious of those empty songs of the siren. Do hear that sucking sound attempting to displace your splendor.

The remedy is simple. (Don’t you just hate that?)

Feel the pain of self-doubt. Stay with that pain. Don’t dive into action to distract yourself again, because that isn’t a long-term solution. Feel the pain of fear. Claim it. Acknowledge it. Scream at it. Cry. When you allow yourself to stay with it, the pain of it cannot own you. You, my dear friend, are not for sale. You cannot be bought with a chocolate yogurt cone. You cannot be rented by the hour. You do not sell out on your glory. Not this time.

Now add equal parts of support. Go get uncomfortable by being vulnerable. Call a couple of people to help you out. Spill your tired beans and ask for the kind of help you need. If you do not know what you need, then allow yourself simply to be held in their love while you squirm like a baby. As you squirm, be aware of how your support, the folks who love you no matter what, hold you both firmly and gently until the seizure of pain quiets down.

Simmer this with something poetic like a walk in nature or a song that has you a God. Be in the same place. Simmer on low for an hour.

The pain will dissipate. The ego will surrender to love. It always has. You have to train and tame that wild animal that has shat upon your dominion.

You are not your distractions. You are not subject to them. You are not powerless. You are_________________________! (Fill in the blank with your truth.)

I am with you on this journey.
And you are loved,
Melanie

There is nothing you can sip, eat, swallow, purchase, sniff, drive, do or wear that brings you to your knees or fills you up the way love does.